I have amazing friends who post wonderful things. With the election growing closer I have woken up a fight for my rights and it appears that blogging is one of my outlets. And because I am also in grad school and slightly brain dead, I will steal the words of others. That's why I make a note to give full credit to Drew, and have changed it because some of you don't know who he is. Here goes...
Dear Friends who may be thinking about voting
AGAINST an initiative, amendment, or candidate because of it's stand FOR
marriage equality: When you hear or read comments about gays, please
replace the word "gay" with my name.
Syd getting married is a threat to all families.
Syd doesn't love, it is only lust.
Syd shouldn't be allowed to marry.
Syd is what is wrong with this country.
Syd is 'fixable' with electroshock therapy.
Syd has enough protection already, he now wants special rights.
If Syd can marry then we should just let people marry animals/children/objects.
Syd isn't fit to be a mother!
The "marriage equality movement" is simply about people who are in love
and want to spend their lives together. It is about a legal recognition
and protection of my commitment - Sydney's commitment - to another
person.
Why has it taken me so long to post? I know this has been burning question on the back of every one's mind. All five of you who read my blog. Cue my list of excuses
1) My computer was broken and I felt the need to ship it back to Minnesota to get it fixed
2) I had to finally think about starting grad school
3) Moving 3 hours north takes a lot of work
4) Classes started and I needed a chance to freak out
After getting a chance to stop and take a breath I can finally tell everyone how excited I am! This is first time I have been excited about reading all text books I have. The first time I am taking notes because I am sincerely interested in what is on the page. And I better enjoy it because I have 2 years of this and a whole lot of reading. I plan on keeping track of how many pages I have read as time passes. So far, since Friday I have tallied 124 pages (I want to note that those are class readings and do not include the book I'm reading to stay sane).
I will admit that my greatest fear was not the reading, or the assignments that will undoubtedly keep me busy throughout all of this...what put my stomach in knots was whether or not I get along with my classmates. For those of you who I haven't told, my program runs on a cohort basis. There are 6 first years total (yes, I said 6) and we are all in the same classes throughout the program. This means that if one person clashes with my awesome personality, there is no escape. Let us all be thankful that the powers that be (the department) chose well and I am can safely say that we will all survive. There will be a lot of chilling.
We were told by several second year students that we would cry at least once in our first year, probably more than once. So far, just once, from one of the passages in my text. I didn't cry when Dumbledore died, or in any books I've read of abuse, genocide, or other things of that nature...but a text book finally pushes me over the edge. So now I feel obliged to share this father's metaphor for his grief after losing his 2-year-old son. I hope you have tissues close by. I am building a three-sided house. It is not a good design. With one side open to the weather, it will never offer complete shelter from life's cold winds. Four sides would be much better, but there is no foundation on one side, and so three walls are all I have to work with. I am building this place from the rubble of the house I used to own...It had four good walls and would, I thought, survive the most violent storm. It did not. A storm beyond my understanding tore my house apart and left the fragments on the ground around me...And so I rebuild. Not, as so many onlookers would suggest, because I need shelter once again. The storm now travels within me, and there is no shelter from the tempest behind doors or walls. Who can show me how to build here now? There are no architects, no experts in designing three-sided houses. Why is it that that so many people seem to have advice for me? "Move on," they say, quite convinced that another house can replace the one I lost...I grow weary of consultations based on murky insight, delivered with such confidence. ...And yet among those who wish to see me house rise again, there are real heroes too. People who are not daunted by the wreckage. It is not a pleasant role for them to play because the dust clings to those who come to see and it will not wash off when they go home...Above all they know how difficult this task is, and no suggestion comes from them about how far along I ought to be.
This time I was able tot make it through without tears, but...wow. This is what I'm getting into. I will be learning how to walk into these houses and let dust cling and make no judgements.
There is another side to my future path, one that fits my hopes and goals to a tee. I read over and over again that the role of the school counselor has roots in advocating for social justice. These things pop up out of the page and I find myself nodding my head with a smile on my face. So, I am sitting here, listening to music which points out these injustices and thinking "hell, yea, I have a purpose!"
I have found myself with way to much time on my hands, and this generally begins in boredom, a little bit of self-pity, lots of reading, and eventually awesome journeys. For those of you who know about the wonderful network called CouchSurfing, then you understand the possibility for new friendships that can begin. The new friend I found, Babak, helped pushed me to get outside. On Wednesday we drove to Sequim and hiked the full 11 miles out and back to the light house at the end of the Dungeness Spit, the longest natural sand bar in the United States. I was able to explore a bit of this natural wonder last month and vowed to return and conquer. My new CS buddy and I made it to the light house after the tours were supposed to be closed, but met a kind volunteer keeper who let us in. An interesting bit of information, the spit grows by 15 feet each year, so although the light house was originally 1/16 of a mile from the end when it was built, there is now a 1/2 mile of new sand. The sun liked us enough to come out from behind the clouds and we watched a colorful sunset back at the trail to the parking lot. I put a lot of thought into what footwear to equip myself with for this sand filled journey, and although I realize that Chacos were a better choice, I have learned that wet Chacos, sand, and 11 miles don't mix well. I am still sporting some good blisters and raw skin from the sand that became trapped between the straps and my feet. Totally worth it.
Next adventure? This one found us 4 hours north in the Mt. Baker Wilderness at the trail head to Church Mountain. Another foggy day, creating an eery sense of isolation and a feeling of accomplishment when we got above the first layer. I was not prepared for the numerous switchbacks that were so long at times as to make us believe that we had reached the end. Lies! My legs burned, my lungs struggled the thin air filled with moisture, and I struggled to fight the disappointment I get on cloudy hikes. After several stops and curses at the incline we reached an awesome snow filled meadow, hidden by just enough fog to make us feel trapped in a bowl, wondering what was waiting for us just beyond. Our intention was to reach the peak of Church Mountain, but after crossing a small stream, we realized that the fog and snow was proving to be more difficult when we were ready for. Turning around with a belly satisfied with Clif Bars and trail mix, we were honored with a peek of the wilderness around us as the fog flew away for a bit. Babak grew silent after making a connection with Middle Earth...or some sort of really cool other worldly spot.
Anyone who has climbed switch back after switch will relate to excitement of being able to climb down something, and our curses when our body betrayed us, making you feel older than we want to. We were pushed onward by the taste of pizza and beer from North Fork (the best way to end any journey around Mt. Baker). Too bad these things couldn't fix the incredibly sore muscles that taunted me for the next few days. Worth it.
And then came the sad day when Babak continued his own adventures on to BC. Back to work and hours spent reading...hours spent ignoring that homework I should be doing. Then along came Alicia, who is an adventurer like me. Our destination? Mt. St. Helen's. Mission created. Let's bring Steve! I've had a lot of crazy misadventures with this guy lately.
This is how every misadventure feels
This was one of the most wonderful misadventures I've had in a long time. I will spoil the story by admitting that the only events that caused this to be a misadventure was a shortage of water towards the end, painful feet, and an inability to make it through the paths we kept taking. Always make sure you have enough water for these things. Soak your feet after. Enjoy where life takes you. The closed trails led me to a small summit and the ability to view four major peaks at once. Mt. Rainer, Mt. Adams, Mt. Hood, and the source of our excitement, Mt. St. Helen's. As we continued on side trails I was dubbed Sydney the Scout, crawling over small washouts and running along rocky trails, in charge of the tough decision on whether to move forward or retreat. I took pride in my work. After blaring sun, breathtaking views, photo ops, and silence as we followed the winding path to the car, we washed off in the cool water of the well placed pump. What's the best way to end a fulfilling day of adventure? More good food, and good beer. I slept hard that night.
So, I must admit that this post has been inspired by my friend's blog, Lady Bottle Blues, and his reflection of his own ADD. And as a typical person with all that ADD or ADHD crap, I was distracted with an attempt to read a handout for homework. Ironic that the topic was Diagnostic Criteria for ADHD. Here's my next confession...I don't have ADHD/ADD...and I'm not a hypochondriac trying to claim a disorder. My reasoning for the post is this. I believe that had I been educated in a typical school system, I might have been a victim of over diagnosis.
1) Does not follow through on instructions or chores: That homework I'm supposed to be doing?
2) Fails to pay close attention to directions: I hate minute details
3) Forgetful: How about that hike I had to cancel 5 minutes ago because I forgot that I have a wedding tomorrow?
4) Easily distracted: This speaks for itself...and also goes along with the next one
5) Avoids sustained mental effort: I wouldn't say avoids so much as, hates doing it all at once
6) Inappropriately runs and climbs
7) Squirms or fidgets
The list goes on, and although many things are over generalized, I've noticed that this explains much of my impulsiveness. But are the symptoms part of ADHD, my mania, or just being human? The friend mentioned earlier, Steve, made some interesting observations about his diagnosis. When learning new things, or adding onto older knowledge, his mind begins to paint a picture of what is being processed. As he learned about the Duwamish people who had lived in what is now Seattle, Steve's brain is now imprinted with the image of people weaving baskets along Lake Union and begins to see past the skyline of the 21st century.
Now hold on just a second. This guy sees things that aren't there? Of course he has some sort of disorder...in the restraints of our typical education system. Unless you were lucky enough to have teachers who cater to your learning style. Enter, the Open School system. The majority of my school years were spent at Clara Barton Open School, and I believe that this saved an incredible number of students from a Ridalin stupor. Rather than reading a book and turning in a two-page essay, we had the choice of an essay, a picture, a play, a speech...whatever conveyed the main ideas and proved your knowledge. To this day, I hate writing papers, but this doesn't mean I missed anything. Like Steve, when I read a book, I see past the words and and generic ideas, but fall into the pictures these words paint. My schooling, from Kindergarten to 12th grade, fostered creativity and helped kids who couldn't stay still.
Unfortunately, universities,community colleges, even graduate schools, do not follow the pattern I'm used to, and I believe the American standard of learning is why I burned out so quickly. Even this online class I'm taking is proving too "normal" for me. I am intrigued by everything I learn, but find it incredibly difficult to sit in front a screen for 15-20 hours a week. If, however, I was able to turn in an art assignment, or show my knowledge in a hands on format, this class with be a blast...but no such luck. I am thankful that Western has me working with clients for a vast majority of the program. Otherwise I could expect another painful school experience...I wonder if professors pull their students into the office to discuss the benefits of Ritalin. I think Steve has a point when he pictures the blessing of his ADHD mind.
In
the future, I imagine, teachers are going to lean in, speaking directly
to parents with a solemn tone, and say, "It appears your son doesn't
have ADD, and it's likely he is going to struggle in school."
I will leave you with this wonderful video, another tidbit from homework I am avoiding.
Has it really been this long? I promised myself I would update more, I promised to never let you down, but laziness has taken over. That and applying for grad school...and celebrating when I was accepted. Oh yea, I am now a grad student soon to study the art of school counseling at Western Washington University. Back to Bellingham I go. This is a much appreciated improvement over last year's rejection, followed by a ridiculous lack of judgement on the part of an organization that shall not be named. Nope, not bitter at all. But hell, the comedy of errors last year has given me time to improve myself, figure out a little more of my life, and rock it AmeriCorps style.
So what else is new? I have been discovering more of Olympia, trying to do some rock climbing here and there with my awesome volunteer, Tobey. This woman is amazing and I am lucky to have her at my site, so I nominated her for the Governor’s 2012 Volunteer Service Award. Lucky duck got to go on field at a Mariner's game and have lunch at the governor's mansion. I shouldn't be too jealous...I missed it because I was in Hawaii.
Hawaii 2012! Hawaii with the Kinsman family! Why am I back in the cold rainy state of Washington? Damn reality check. Too bad I had all sorts of energy to brag about my trip about 2 hours ago, but was then side tracked by Maggie bringing home a friend and her two adorable kids. I'll end the post with this, its not what you know, its who you know. Because when you know the right people, they will pay your way to Hawaii to hang out with their awesome kids to see awesome things. Like dolphins, sea turtles, and volcanoes.
How to get by without electricity.
1) Buy wood-burning stove
2) Start fire
3) Cook oatmeal on stove top
4) Grind coffee by sticking beans in plastic bag, cover with cloth, find hammer, take out anger
5) Wait forever as water heats up on stove
6) Be thankful for sunshine
7) Pour water in French Press...oh...don't have one? You are unprepared for the Zombie Apocalypse!
8) Find good books and stay sane until power comes back on just in time for sun to go down
9) Don't get your hopes up because power will go out again because you live in the boonies
10) Hope you have enough candles and batteries to make it through the night
Never, in all my years living in Minnesota, did I have this many snow days in a row (this makes 4). The last snow day I remember having was (power went out again right here) during my 8th grade year. And that was only one day off! I will give this town some credit...there are trees falling down everywhere so the roads aren't exactly the safest to drive on. Now we hope for the one plow to come through and clear out the roads, then maybe the damn power can turn back on! For those wondering how I'm on the internet...we stole Paige's electricity and interwebs. Peace for now!
Well folks, its been awhile. My laptop died and I had the adventure of trying to rescue my Hard drive. So, seeing as we've got a little snow on the ground...and I have no car to go into town with, I figured this is a good time to give whoever reads this an update. Maggie left me for the weekend while she has some girl time up in Seattle (and I get to sleep in and play Zelda: Twilight Princess!). Until she returns, today's adventure includes cleaning, reading, and maybe some snow time with the Egglestons. Although I'm not sure how great the sledding is when the 1/4 inch of snow is already to starting to melt. Washington...
Maren and Leona Face!
Happy belated Holidays to all! (I apologize for the scattered nature of this blog entry. It seems that a full french press of coffee and the distraction of snow is detrimental to the task at hand). I was able to go home for Christmas to see family and my old pets. Minnesota probably missed me over my absence of a year and a half, but I was hoping I could have been greeted by a damn good snowstorm. Sadly, I have seen more snow in the PNW than the humble Midwest. As I intended for my trip home to be filled with home cooked meals, family time, and being lazy, I didn't plan to visit too many friends. But, after Christmas was over I found myself a little bored and got a hold of some folks I hadn't seen for years. While getting coffee with Leona, I was convinced to go to a South HS theater nerd get together...and damn I had fun! Seeing how everyone has stayed connected made me miss all those friends that I lost touch with (but will never forget) and started me on a new mission to figure out who else was in town. Needless to say, catching up was a humbling experience as I always seem to lose contact with those I move away from. At the same time, I remember how blessed I am to have so many amazing people in my life.
New Year's was a blast (even if not what we expected). Maggie and I went downtown with some of my AmeriCorps buddies to hit up the Eagle's Club for live funk music...only to realize that the whole dance floor was filled with people in their 50s and over. Ok, saying the dance floor was filled gives the party too much credit. After grabbing a quick snack we ditched the joint to check out a block party a few blocks away. DJ on the roof!! Dance party in the street!! Clearly too early for the party to be hoppin' so we went back the Eagle's to catch the band (not too shabby) and made it back to the block party for the countdown as there was promise of a snow machine. Sweet dance music, half a block filled with excited Olympians, and a need to get my dance on. All for free?! The countdown happened, champagne bottles were poppin' here and there...now for the snow. NOT! Although, I must say, white beach balls thrown off the roof was a fun alternative.
Other than the excitement of the holidays, my blogging hiatus has been fairly unexciting. Between going back to work, figuring out computer problems (eventually having to buy a new one), and applying for grad school...let's just say I've been a little busy. Not to mention my mission to save Princess Zelda. I felt a little nerdier after working to get my old hard drive into an external case while sitting at the bar. I should watch my actions in public or people might mistake me for a computer expert.
I will end on this fantastic news. My dad is finally working up in Northern Minnesota. I believe it has been his calling for quite sometime.
