Adventures in Online Dating

Just try and resist this face!

   I've had a couple people ask me to blog about this particular topic...maybe because its a strange phenomenon and I talk about the whole thing in a ridiculous manner.  The world of online dating simply confounds me.  Here I am ladies of North West Washington!  Please judge me based on my essay responses to these formulated questions.  And check out these super great pictures of me going on adventures!  Do I post that sarcastic duck-face self-portrait I took a week ago?  Or will people think I am being serious?  Or maybe they'll know I'm joking and take offense to it.  Don't worry, I didn't actually over analyze it...that much.
    Let's go back a step.  First, one must choose a username. Oh, the possibilities!  Unfortunately, I couldn't browse other users until I named myself, which meant I was not given any examples to work from.  So, in my inexperienced online dating decision making, I went with something generic and missed my chance for creativity.  I would have liked the sound of Singly_Confused...it has a nice ring to it.  Before you ask, no, I will not tell you my actual username.  I won't even tell you what site I'm using! Because I prefer to be judged by strangers online who may or may not be attracted to me.
   Next, selling myself through these wonderful essay questions.  What are the six things I can't live without?  What am I doing on a typical Friday night?  Here's my favorite.  What am I doing with my life?  Somehow, this turned into a counseling session.  How much honesty should I pour into these things?  "Hey there!  I'm reinventing myself while trying not to go crazy during graduate school," or "I have no idea what I'm doing on here, but I thought I'd try it out.  Please be nice."  At least I can be pretty objective in my Friday night answer.
   Now, in order to be matched with anyone, I was put through the gauntlet of questions about politics, sex, drugs, religion, and everything in between.  After about 100 of those (more if you want your match statistics to be a little better), I can finally "accurately" search for people.  By accurate, I mean this.  I am given three different numbers when looking at a girl's profile.  First, the percentage this site believes that we will be a good match.  Second, the percentage of amazing friendship we will have.  Last...the best one...the chance that we will actually be enemies.  Thanks?
   What the hell do I do with these numbers?  How willing am I to meet that 92% match right now?  What does 74% really mean?  Did I answer those questions correctly?  Screw it, I just want to meet new people!
   And then comes the biggest test of online dating.  The pictures.  How much am I judging this girl based on her picture?  What does it say about me if I am judging her?  As humans, we can't help it.  And if this site didn't tell a person that I looked at their profile, I would try to look past that first picture.  But, I feel weird about the girl knowing I checked out her profile and moved right on along.  I see what visitors I had and wonder..."why wasn't I good enough for you?"  Not really.  But I am curious to know why people decide to make contact or just pass on through.
   Which brings me to this.  Getting a message from someone is so exciting!  Hooray!  And why?  Because, feeling wanted feels pretty damn good.  And sometimes I'm just a little too nervous to initiate that contact.  How do you start a message to someone on a dating website?  The act of saying hello already implies that you are interested.  Our intentions are laid out by being on here in the first place.  So, what's the point of small talk?  Then again...you sound like a creep if you come right on out and say, "Hey, you're hot and I could see myself kissing you sometime."  Throw that draft out the window!  A simple, hello, followed by some statement which proves you read their profile seems to do the trick.  And then, hell, what do I have to lose by pressing send?  That's the nice thing about the internet.  I don't see their look of disgust or confusion.  I just never hear back and move right on along.
   There are so many more thoughts I could put up here for you to read, but I haven't yet organized them and don't want to put you through that.  Just know this...my adventures in online dating are quite amusing, pretty great, and further practice in being open to what's out there.  Plus...it makes for good stories!